Tuesday, June 15

105. Lesson Not Learned

Don't you hate it when someone is trying to teach you a lesson but didn't inform you that you were being tested? Personally, I hate that crap. If you want me to do something or realize some life lesson that is so incredibly important to you, then just tell me. Tell it to my face or call me and let me know you're not going to be there or help me out or go through with a prior agreement. Re-negging? Fine and dandy. How about letting me know you're going to leave me high and dry? The only "tough love" life lesson I'm learning is to not bother including you in my life because you don't respect me enough to let me know you're too busy or don't feel up to caring anymore. Who knows? The feeling may be neutral, folks.

I do not enjoyed being lulled into a false sense of security and then being slapped in the face when the notion hits. I'm too prideful, stubborn, vengeful, and bitter of a person to put up with that for long. And I'm okay with that about myself. I'm still learning which battles are worth fighting but that's my deal and I'm comfortable with the progress I'm making with growing up. Maybe you should try that out. I'm still making mistakes left and right, but I'm own up to it and do my best to make it right and then prevent it from happening again. What is your excuse? Age is but a number and respect is something to be earned and not given. If I didn't ask for it, I don't owe you anything. It's not my responsibility. It's yours, so don't dump it on me when you're done harboring it. The life I'm choosing doesn't work like that. I can be selfish and spoiled, but I give back. I used to play those dirty manipulative games, mostly because I would have semi-neutral parties ask me to hold back and not confront- I've gotten over holding that back. I have to many other better things to put my time and energy towards than that and yes, most of that finally involves me and my plans.

Most of my life, my personal wants and needs were put on a back burner - if they were even in the kitchen at all- because of fear and insecurity. I have been done with that. It's a shame that you choose not to see that I'm stepping my game up and growing up. Ultimately, that is your problem and I stopped accommodating that.

... Grrr- rabble- rabble. I walked away for a minute to cool off a little more and it was enough to make me want to stop ranting and venting. Some people are sadly not worth the time or effort. I shall go kill some monsters (aka mobs) in WoW to blow off more steam now. ^_^ See you tomorrow! <3

1 comment:

  1. Goodness, Vi! I'm sorry you have someone in your life, or had someone in your life, that could be like that. It's sad sometimes to see what people you thought were your friends can do. I enjoy reading your rantings so, please, rant on! :)


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