Sunday, September 12

194. Maybe Next Time

I really disappoint myself... often. After you admit to a specific problem, it's feels worse when you keep having the problem under near full awareness. There is just something in my head that doesn't click and I just keep on with my bad habits that are quite detrimental to the plans that I've been making for myself. Almost as if there's another you in your head that wants to see you fail. Curse you, self-fulfilling prophecy. One good thing about all the psychology classes I've taken is that I know more names of things to blame/ yell at- or the fact that there's a name out there for it, so I can find it and then blame/ yell at it. : )

I just don't know what to do with myself right now. I've made progress, but at this point in my life just making some progress isn't good enough. It sounds harsh but it's the truth. I'm so far behind of where I feel I should and need to be that now is the time that I need to be making leaps and bounds of headway.

Bah!

Sigh, it's not the end of the world, just breathe and do what should be done. It's can be a big deal but no big deal at the same time. Breathe. Breeeeeathe. *sharp inhale and exhale*

I think I need to go seek therapy again. We'll see. See you tomorrow. <3

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